Girl Meets World - Girl Meets Money - Review

I’m a writer when I am not your ever-faithful Girl Meets World reviewer. I’m also an outliner, though more by-the-seat-of-my-pants than most hyper attentive sorts. I have a very particular way of doing so that I’ve realized over time is what works best for me. I break the story down to acts. I write the basic structure of a scene, with a summation of what people say, with a bit of on the nose HE SAID/SHE SAID unless I can already see the scene clearly in my head. If there is a particularly key scene, I’ll note a reminder of what its purpose is in the plot at large. If it’s a changeover though, or a plot twist, that’s usually just a line. A “THIS HAPPENS HERE” with a DUN! for mood.

Watching “Girl Meets Money” feels a lot like writing one of those outlines. That is to say, it’s hard to believe there was a script, and that it didn’t just skip from that outline stage to filming, without any thought in between. Signposting takes the place of dialogue, as everyone tells us how they feel and what they’re thinking and what today’s lesson is. Plotting is skeletal, as Minkus loses all of his money, Farkle confesses to how formerly wealthy he was, and then becomes wealthy again all in the space of … a minute? Five? I’m not really sure because I still don’t actually follow what happened. I did not see what happened. There was merely a bullet point explaining that things changed. Was Minkus only making an assumption that they would lose all their money because it looked like their investment might not pan out? Maybe—he says as much vaguely. Surely such a thing is out of character for a hyper intelligent business and technology mogul, though I guess not for this show.

More important though is the lack of thought—or, perhaps, the lack of ability to have thought, as the show reveals a darker, privileged view on what poverty means. “Teach me to be poor,” Farkle says (more or less) earlier, signposting our way towards a version of this story with Maya Hart as center. As the least financially gifted of the group, she’s also tasked with helping Farkle through this difficult time, and to a certain extent, I can live with that. But when the show begins to elevate this to a superpower, as if Maya’s economic status makes her into an actually different, more human being, it’s impossible to just sit blithely and watch. Being poor is not a gifted mindset, a purer state of being that allows for a real experience the unfortunate wealthy among us will never experience. It’s simply injustice. It’s simply the fact that in the large pie chart Cory draws on the board, there’s an us and a them. A magical 1% that has more money than they could ever need, and a 99% that could use it.

Which, to the show’s credit, it talks about. Cory draws the pie chart. Not well, not fully, but it does. But when Farkle sells Mark Cuban of all people (seriously, why is he appearing?) on investing potentially millions in a way to improve the world as part of Minkus’ new family foundation, and lands on Maya Hart? There might be merit in “Meets Money”, but it’s really only the idea of poverty as a shining example of humanity that I can focus on. “Invest in Maya Hart,” he tells us. But why does Maya get the money? What exactly is she going to do with it? Why is Riley’s plan about Halloween stupid when UNICEF trick or treating has been a thing for decades? None of these questions are answered, nor are they apparently supposed to be asked. Maya Hart deserves the money, because she has been made pure through her hardship and her bootstraps mentality, as we know because Farkle said so pretty explicitly. She’ll do good things with it. Or, more likely for this show, it’ll never get mentioned again unless there’s some other lesson to be learned.

And this is a problem. I need to be completely and utterly clear about this, this is a big problem. Farkle, post- not pre-enlightenment, builds a model of Maya’s bedroom to stand in the middle of his own bedroom, for whenever he wants to feel closer to Maya’s perfect point of view. He places an actual web camera to look in on Maya’s street, so he can still feel connected to the poor huddled masses. Farkle tells us over and over that he’s embarrassed by his wealth, but is he really? Or is he, like many with similar privilege, just upset he's being reminded he should be embarrassed? It is an important distinction, and by failing to make or even understand it, GMW nearly destroys all good will I have for the character. Whether intended or not (and let’s be real, the problem is that it’s not), Farkle fetishizes the idea of not being wealthy, from the safe vantage of never having to truly experience it himself. He lives and thinks in money. He can do anything he wants, which is why the episode’s “conflicts” run only on things that are still being denied him despite this. Minkus doesn’t come home as often as he should! Except as an impossibly wealthy man he could quit his job tomorrow if he wants to and let someone else simply run things; he can afford to come home at any hour when his son walks out; and except sorry, Farkle—as it turns out, those who have to work just to get by rarely get this pleasure. Farkle wants to help people instead of being rich and doesn’t know how he can!  Except they can afford to give millions away; now they’re going to; and except it comes at no disadvantage to them, and clearly does not mean they will have to cut back. Farkle wants to live more simply, and more purely? Then maybe he should actually start by doing so, rather than playing pretend with the lives of others.

It’s what you do with money that counts, Cory tells us. But exactly when it is we saw money being used effectively and wisely in “Meets Money,” I’m not sure. There are sparks of what I consider the usual inherent Girl Meets World sweetness, of the show that once created a quite kind umbrella exchange program for those in need. A warmer coat bought for a woman who needs it. A crowded window on a dark city night, as Farkle and company can’t all fit. But they’re only reminders of a show I normally count on to be a lot more down to earth than this—a show I’m eager to see return to wipe this episode from memory.